Breaking the Ice

[Adera]

I wouldn't say that I only dress to please others, quite often I dress to please my own vanity as well.

Anyway a hi or hello is very common and it doesn't stick out in the least so it rarely catches my attention. A witty comment or something of the sort is much more likely to catch my attention and make me interested in actually talking some to the person.

However, a lot of people, even those that had a good way to get my attention often end up way short... and that's because in the next few messages they'll ask me to room with them. I mostly decline those requests at once, I'm rarely interested in rooming right of the bat and definitely not with someone I don't know at all.

To really break the ice and get me interested is if I get the feeling that there is some sexual tension with whom I'm chatting with and not just a one sided desire to get off. But of course that's quite picky so I mostly end up only chatting when I'm online, I'm perfectly fine with that myself but I guess there are many who primarily want to get off when they log on.

I guess that what I want to say is that even though you might get a response, or more, the conversation can die very quickly if you're looking for different things.

[mercer78]

Hi Adera thanks for the reply I agree I've never been one to push for room after a few messages because for it's as much about the social aspect as it is about getting off.  A lot of times when I log in I just chat to my friends for a bit and anyone else who feels like joining in like to think I'm a pretty friendly guy.

[CondomGirl]

This is a really interesting discussion. To be honest I think that breaking the ice is not very difficult from a woman's point of view. I just think most of the men are just too superficial to break the ice. I do not want to tell all the secrets about women but I would like to agree to a few of the points that have been mentioned before and add maybe some new sights.

First of all, men tend to not to read profiles carefully enough. We do spent a lot of time in being creative in filling out our profiles. If a "female" profile is not completely filled out I tend to assume that this "female" is not really a "female" in real life :-) So if we spent lot sof thinking in our profile text then we went people to read and recognize what we wrote. So reading the profile and starting the conversation according to what girls have written IS REALLY an ice-breaker.

Another think is the greetings with just a plain "hi" or "hello" or "how r u". If I wouldn't be fine I wouldn't be online with AChat at the moment so the question is completely useless. Especially if women have a "talkative" attribute in her profile - do not expect to break the ice with a simple one word comment. Try to adress her in full sentences with some kind of a sentence structure.

Again, comments about our dresses are REALLY welcomed. We do not spent hours in front of a mirror, shopping four hours to find the right dress and like to change our dresses according to the mood for the reason that nobody recognizes. So if you see  a girl in nylon stockings, a latex dress or a belly dancer outfit that might be points where you could start a conversation with.

And what is also interferes the effort to break the ice is the too early question if a girl wants to join room with you or even if she wanna fuck. Guys please, in times of emancipation don't you think we would not let you know as soon as we would like to join room with you or want to have sexual fun? Additionally, at least for me it is often the case that I have aparallel chats with more than just one nice guy. So I do not stop all the chats immediately just to quickly jump into a room with someone I just met a few sentences before. So rely on the fact that a real, self-assured women will ask you to join room when she is ready for it.

As I said I do not want to tell you too many secrets but just for the guys that just need a virtual whore to get off: look rather for the "females" with a "sex maniac" attribute in their profile than for the ladies that say "romantic" or "talkative" in it!

Well guys, any questions left or did I just scared you away?

P.S.: If a guy takes those tips by heart I am pretty sure that he will increase his chances to break the ice with a girl from 2-3 % to 95 % and that is pretty good. YOu never get a 100 % guarantee for anything in life. Therefore, 95 % is pretty good, isn't it?

[Lydiarose]

I have to agree with a lot of what Condomgirl  has said but not it all.

I will just say to you just be yourself  Mercer79  you were very nice to me the other night

[mercer78]

Thanks  Lydiarose that's pretty much what I'm like most of the time and again thank you all for taking the time to contribute this is a really great community here on the forum.

[Cheya]

Thanks  Lydiarose that's pretty much what I'm like most of the time and again thank you all for taking the time to contribute this is a really great community here on the forum.

I could post some messages of mercer from the very beginning were he was a little more pushy . The answers given here are overall a pretty good example, adding some creativity is always helpful, standing out of the ordinary is a big plus!

[mercer78]

Was I really that bad? 

[Cheya]

Was I really that bad? 

Awwe *hug*

[Momma_andrea]

Since reading this I changed my chat profile and once or twice a day
I change my tag line to song lyrics and the guys will guess at the song. see, I'm trying to help them.
But some... some don't get it. And the guys I'm already friends with are competing to guess it first.
It's being kind of fun.

[Lover]

Will be helpful for many members. Hope they also read this topic

[mercer78]

Agreed Lover I think some get a bit disheartened from the lack of response and just quit I know I almost did.