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: Out of the Darkness  ( 11213 )
Bear
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« : June 05, 2012, 04:51:57 PM »

A little more of a serious topic than most...

A few here know of events which rocked my world in March and prompted me to withdraw and recollect myself. The suicide of a family member was the third of my immediate circle of friends and family members within a yer span to hit me . Devastating numbers to say the least, yet as a survivor of the impact it has heightened my awareness,... and touched on a sensitivity to the words and actions displayed by those around me.

Depression,... hopelessness,..., the sense of abandonment... it can be precipitated by many events,.. and sometimes the issues might just seem  frivolous to us.  To those affected,... well the issues feel overwhelming. In the US alone, suicide costs a life every 15 minutes... an attempt made every minute...world wide... the statistics are even more alarming.

Suicide is forcasted worldwide  to be the largest cause of death for individuals under the age of 25.

It was rumored that are community lost a member to suicide... a sad fact if true... and though we might not feel obligated... when we see people write of matters which are dark,... ominous or blatant (yes I have heard of some  who have written of the  threat of suicide) we should take a measure of response and communicate a genuine plead that they take a moment and talk with a professional of the issue affecting their life.

The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention sponsors the Out of the Darkness community walks across the US for the purpose of drawing awareness to the issues, funding for research and preventative support, and counseling for survivors faced with the loss. 

Their link:  http://www.outofthedarkness.org/
For Hotlines here in the states: http://suicidehotlines.com/

Check it out.... support the cause... be aware... the life you save may be one closer than you think.

Unfortunately it is an American program only,... sad since my understanding is this matter is even greater in many countries of Europe and Asia. I hope that many in our European/Asian  community might list the resources available here in this thread. We are an international community... and speak across the borders.

Sorry for raising a dark topic... but the need here is great in me to spread the word.
Many thanks... and may your days shine bright.


hentaiboy69
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« #1 : June 06, 2012, 09:20:52 AM »

Bear, probably this is one of the worst experience a person can live......it's hard when someone we care will die for natural reason, but thinking someone wanna take away his life, is really sad, specially if he is someone so colose to us and we never had seen any sign of his desperation.

pafe, you are perfectly right.....it's hard to accept we can maybe do more for her (or him) before she take the worst decision and it will be hard to pass over it...



it was 2004, i think.......a friend (we wasn't so closed, but i know him till we was 11 or 12) took his life alone, in a car........for his family and her girlfriend was really hard at that time! for father and mother, it's realy hard to say goodbye to a soon.....they allways hope their soon will have a long and happy life.....so sad, my friends!

chien_lubrik
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Evelyne


« #2 : June 06, 2012, 09:58:06 AM »

Hello kinds peoples of the DreamWorld's Forum.

Wanting to live no more, Seeing no hope, no more interest or view on future? feeling that our life is helpless and meaningless is an awful feeling that may lead to tragedy. Ans facts are , as Mr Bear said, that they actually do.

I had, as many peoples: close friends who chose to end there live. And It IS a tragedy.
A feeling of failure to those who survives. Failure to help that may be avoided.
Death of a close person is always a tragedy, by suicide bring this deep regret ...

Here French organisations to help those who feel depressed and think there is no more colors in their life:
Voici quelques contacts en France pour aider ceux qui connaissent des gens en danger :

SOS Amitié : ( phone call to have advise, and warnings about yourself or relations )
                     Pour des conseils et une écoute vous concernant ou des proches )
http://www.sosamitieidf.asso.fr/
01 42 96 26 26

Le Refuge : ( Emergency help and advise )
                   Aide d'urgence
http://www.le-refuge.org
06 31 59 69 50

Suicide Ecoute : ( if you feel a close relation feel depressed )
                           Pour des conseils de fond et pour eviter un drame
http://www.suicide-ecoute.fr/
01 45 39 40 00

If you acted, please! there is hope! It's not too late :
Si vous êtes passé à l'acte , il n'est jamais trop tard : le 15, dites " Je viens de me suicider" et donnez votre adresse.

SAMU :      15
Pompiers : 18

Please accept my best humbly regards.


Flesh open when Mind Warm
Lover
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« #3 : June 06, 2012, 05:13:08 PM »

I wanna bring some lightness in this important and worthwile topic. It's wonderful to see we also can talk about these serious and (for all who are concerned personally) awful experience in this forum. I can recognize two things:
It's a sign of big trust to the community (which also HB did with his topic). And, though we all are here for fun, the community knows to have fun but also talks about experiences, sad themes, awful incidents. In a special way no one is alone. I appreciate this.

It's so hard if you have to recognize you can't really help, though you do your best. You're asking what else you could have done... and feel guilty, though your brain says you did everything that has been possible... no matter if someone falls into a depression or does suicid...
Unfortunately many of the things we try (with best intention) don't help, but seem to boost the bad feelings of the other person. So my advice for everyone: We hardly can help - we just can try to ask the person to ask for professionell help and also ask for help in institutions that offer help - like the one Bear and Eve posted, the crises line, red cross....

Thanks Bear for starting this thread. It's not just a milestone in AChat forum, but hopefully a big help for everyone. If this thread just can save one life, it's worth to talk about...

TightFit74
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« #4 : June 07, 2012, 12:23:10 AM »

Bear,

thank you for posting this subject. It was and is painful for me to read about it. 6 months ago I lost someone myself to suicide and 17 years ago I had everything prepared to end my own life. Fortunately I was found and I looked for help. The thread brought back a lot of memories I'd rather forget, but from first hand experience, I know how important help can be.

For people in holland, there are a few places you can go to for help:

Stichting Korrelatie
www.korrelatie.nl
0900-1450

113online
www.113online.nl
0900-1130113


Stichting EX6
www.ex6.nl/chat
088-3963963

Sensoor
www.sensoor.nl
0900-0767

It is the darkest hour, when someone decides to step out of life. I found the reasons to go on, eternally grateful for the help I got. I hope I will one day get the chance to repay that debt. Life is beautiful, even in the darkest hours. Having been there, I appreciate the wonderful things that life has to offer, so much more.


The mind... the most powerful Aphrodisiac...
Adera
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« #5 : June 07, 2012, 12:33:47 AM »

My sympathies to you and your family Bear. *hugs*
Bear
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« #6 : June 07, 2012, 06:07:44 AM »

I appreciate the condolences, but please PM them to me and help keep this thread as clean as possible as a resource for those in need.

It is important though to comment that organizations like the AFSP provide counseling services and support groups for those impacted by suicides of family members and friends. Leading the survivors from the desperation, guilt and second guessing impacting their lives is a difficult task,... but the process of healing must always start somewhere. I offer that as a gentle nudge to any faced with such tragedy impacting their lives.

Satoire
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« #7 : June 07, 2012, 01:39:45 PM »

As a survivor of a suicide attempt and one who still comtemplated it for a few years, I found help through local organizations and local professionals, and one person in particular who latched on to me and wouldn't let go.

I found these two organizations very helpful to me and to others.

http://www.suicidology.org
An excellent site for assistance with every phase of mental depression and suicide.

http://www.suicide.org
Another excellent site that includes phone numbers.

Both of these sites have online help and telephone numbers and they care about you.  They are located in the United States, but I'm sure if anyone contacted them online they would definitely help.

hentaiboy69
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« #8 : June 08, 2012, 03:08:06 AM »

As a survivor of a suicide attempt and one who still comtemplated it for a few years, ........

oh, wow......i never espect this, Satoire......you look so shiny and full of life......i can presume you had pass over that dark period and i'm realy so happy for this!  :-*

taztexan
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« #9 : June 08, 2012, 11:48:46 AM »

As a survivor of a suicide attempt and one who still comtemplated it for a few years, I found help through local organizations and local professionals, and one person in particular who latched on to me and wouldn't let go.


I'm so glad you survived and that the person who latched on to you never let go. If she hadn't I may not of had the pleasure of meeting you. Something that has been very rewarding and interesting to say the least.

You as well as a few others know about my daughter and the rough time she went through back when she was 13-14 years old. Through the help of professionals and a lot of love from me and her mother, she totally turned her life around and became the remarkable woman she is today. She's going for her Masters and excels at all she puts her mind to.

My sympathy and prayers go out to you and yours Bear. I'm always available to chat with all my friends, and though we've not met, I consider you one from what I have read here from you.. I too have went through a bout of deep depression and a total feeling of worthlessness and hopelessness. I was ready to die and didn't care any more. After surviving two heart attacks it finally dawned on me that I still have unfinished business yet to do.  Luckily I suffered no real heart damage and am as healthy as a horse, just not hung like one. As long as I eat right and exercise I'll live a long and happy life. Both of which I'm doing. =)


Through perseverance and a few friends here on Achat, I have totally snapped out of a depression that lasted over 2 years and what you see now, here and in person is the true man that I am... Come chat with me sometime..

Thanks for letting me share too...




« : June 08, 2012, 12:09:58 PM taztexan »

Lt. Taz, Spermicide Detective Div.  -  The devilish Texan  =)~
Brandybee
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Sweet As Honey With A Cheeky Sting. BUZZ !!


« #10 : June 12, 2012, 07:14:05 PM »

Out of the darkness is hope and family and friends and the sun on your face ... choose life

My life too has been blighted by suicide, one of my best friends brother took his own life. It was unexpected.He was 22years old, no money worries, his whole life ahead of him.. and no note. The hardest thing we found was there was no answer to the why as well as coping with his sudden and unexpected death. There are still no answers...

In the UK & Ireland we have the SAMARITANS. It is a confidential emotional support service for anyone in the UK and IRELAND. The service is available 24 hrs a day, 7 days a week for people who are experiencing feelings of despair including those which may lead to suicide. You can also call the Samaritans if you need support with helping someone you are worried about.

Tel :-                08457 90 90 90  for the price of a local call.

PHONE:-          08457 90 91 92 if you are deaf or hard of hearing

EMAIL:-            jo@samaritans.org

WRITE TO :-    Chris. PO Box 9090, Stirling. FK8 2SA

Pick up the phone, Dont suffer in silence,  Think of the people you leave behind,  Choose  life.


                         :)   :D   :P    THERE'S  A  LITTLE  BIT  OF  DEVIL  IN  MY  ANGEL  EYES       :)    :D    :P
Bear
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« #11 : December 24, 2012, 08:33:57 AM »

Bumping this topic, .

Sadly this time of year when many are celebrating the arrival of one who leads humanity from darkness, is also a time of the highest rate of suicides.

Feelings of inadequacy, failure,... hopelessness may fill the soul, but there is help,.. and ways io help, ...reach out make a difference
 

Brandybee
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Sweet As Honey With A Cheeky Sting. BUZZ !!


« #12 : December 25, 2012, 07:45:32 AM »

Don't  let those dark thoughts win,  reach out, make that phone call to a friend or a professional ...  Choose life, never give up... Trust me, there are joys just around the corner....



                         :)   :D   :P    THERE'S  A  LITTLE  BIT  OF  DEVIL  IN  MY  ANGEL  EYES       :)    :D    :P
Lover
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« #13 : December 25, 2012, 08:46:35 AM »

The problem for each person in darkness: They know there is light. And this is the hardest thing. Knowing there is a better life and  (believing) being unable to reach it.
We can't say "c'mon think positive, look at the good sides of your life" though we want to help, we just increase the bad feelings.

All we can do here is giving addresses for help, listen to, being there if our help is asked for.
Sometimes it's enough to get the feeling of having someone being close, sometimes you need a kick in your ass.  Pondering and too much thinking is dangerous in these moments. Action, doing something, being active is best you can do.

You also can write down your thoughts and worries. There are several ways to handle it. Looking back, realizing most of our fears never become real. Making a plan to avoid those fears come true, burning them in a little ceremony or sending them away - to a special person.



« : December 25, 2012, 09:00:37 AM Lover »

Brandybee
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Sweet As Honey With A Cheeky Sting. BUZZ !!


« #14 : August 12, 2014, 01:20:51 PM »

Bumping this topic in light of recent events.

Remember  Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.   Choose Life.  You are not alone, just reach out. You will see.



                         :)   :D   :P    THERE'S  A  LITTLE  BIT  OF  DEVIL  IN  MY  ANGEL  EYES       :)    :D    :P
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