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Hmmph.
BB is much too nice. I was about to put this guy on blast. I guess taking the higher road is best.
I just have one question for Jensen aka Trek……
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Do you want a banner? You have no banner. I can make you one.
Oh man. She did all that?
Bravo. Pretty good stuff. I'm already posting for her to join. Maybe she can create something for me.
Hm..don't feel down.
*does a funny face to cheer ya' up*
Perk up. I've made tons of enemies already in the game, and it's no skin off my back. Shit like that is bound to happen, whether it's warranted or not. You just gotta move on is all, and live and let die.
Or you can troll this guy hard. So very hard.
Child is named
lol..I was about to leave for the movies, until I saw your prediction, with 'will be' in red caps.
You got me!Next will be Sir James.
(runs out the door)
The encounterHukk & Lover
When two sexual forces collide*knock knock knock*
Lover aka The Love Doctor aka The Love Guru, looks over his shoulder after noticing the loud knocks against his door. His small apartment is well kept and tidy; every item neatly placed and positioned for this special occasion. “Come in. The door is open.” he says with a gruff tone.
I help myself in, as instructed and give my greetings. “Mr. Lover. Are you ready to experience heaven?” I simply ask.
Lover examines me from head to toe. I sport nothing but tight white shorts, dark sunglasses, a black bow tie and party hat. My muscles pulse underneath my attire, ready to lash itself out at any given moment.
“Is that get up really necessary?” Lover questions with a disturbed look.
“For this special night? Yes.” I reply. “Also, I was dry cleaning most of my clothes and this is all I could find to wear. The bow tie is from party city.” I add.
Lover, walks over wearing a well pressed police uniform. I slowly lower my glasses to better observe him and can only mutter out three words. “Mother of God.” The man looked rugged and toned; his chiseled pecs flexing with each small movement he made. It was an orgasmic experience to simply observe.
“Alright, lets get down to it!” he screams, clapping his hands. He begins to remove his clothing….very seductively. I bite my lips nodding my head. “Yea, don't rush it. Let it just slide off your body. Feel the soft sensation of the fabric brush against your body.” I instruct.
Having removed most of his clothing, he finally sprawls himself down onto the carpet floor, awaiting my well prepared hands. “Alright. Take me to heaven.” He says. “Oh you'll be getting a trip to heaven alright. I've soaked my hands in warm oils for days just to make sure they're the right level of softness for your skin. Also, I had my hands blessed.” I whisper.
“Really? By a priest?” He asks, looking back at me. “Ummmm well yea, sorta. I did go to a priest, but when I revealed to him why I needed them blessed, he sorta freaked out. Long story short, I am now banned from stepping foot inside any Catholic church in New Jersey for life.” I conclude.
“So…who blessed them?” he asks with a puzzled gaze. “A homeless guy, named Larry from down the block. He also, gave me a 5$ coupon for Charmin tissues. I had no idea the amount of coupons homeless people have!” I say, shaking my head in disbelief. Lover shrugs his shoulders, as he lays back down. I make my way over to his radio speaker, and begin to insert my Ipod onto the dock. “I hope you don't mind…but I downloaded some sweet, hot tunes for this moment.” I whisper. “Not at all.” He replies back.
The room is soon filled with the sexy, soft soulful music of Boyz II Men. “Mmmm oooh yea. Now this is my jam.” I say, shaking my hips as I clumsily make my way over towards Lover. I kneel down, and begin to apply a collection of sweet scented lotions. “Now just relax and let your mind go.” I whisper. My hands finally begin to swim across Lover's back; gently riding along the bumpy waves of his muscled well toned body.
He begins to breath lightly. “Hmm…hey this actually feels pretty good..I'm actually enjoying thi-.” Lover is cut short, as I begin to Karate chop his back.“HEEEEEYA! HEEEEEEYA! Judo Chop!” I scream out loudly while my hands slice and dice atop Lovers body. “OOW! What the hell?!” He yells, turning his back. “Relax! I saw this on youtube. They say it releases your stress!” I blurt . “You know…actually it does feel good. One more chop Hukk.” he requests. “Oh…imma give you a good one. The question is..are you ready?”
“I'm always ready…” Lover replies. “WHOOOOOHAAA! Judo Chop of Ecstasy!” I scream. Lover bites his lips, as a slow moan rolls out from his mouth. “That hit the spot…” He says in a whimper.
Suddenly, Lover begins to feel my body slipping and sliding atop his. “What in Gods name are you doing now?” He asks with an exasperated tone.
“I'm giving you a deep tissue massage. Don't question my methods!” I cry out, my body rolling around his like a log. A few moments pass, before I finally tire out. “Phew, that was….something else.” I say, wiping away the sweat from my brow. “Alright, don't you move Lover. I'll be right back!” I say, springing to my feet and running over to the table. Lover lays against the carpet, wondering what I had planned. “Hukk, can I turn? What are you doing?” demands Lover. Soon, his ears are bombarded with the sounds of clicks and shutters emanating from my camera phone. “Are you taking pictures of me laying here?!” He shouts.
“I WANT TO CAPTURE THIS MOMENT! DON'T JUDGE ME!” I shout.
“Arrhg..if you're gonna take pictures, at least warn me before hand….so I can strike poses!” he playfully replies. He begins to imitate a panther, roaring at me as I feverishly capture this moment. “Yes! Show me your wild side! Just let your inner Panther out!” I cry.
Lover begins to feel his inner panther crawl and gnaw itself out from its imposed jail…..now roaming free and wild across the room for my own enjoyment. “Roooooaar!” he growls out, beating onto his chest.Minutes pass, before I finally cease. “Stopping already? Got enough then?” he questions. “Oh yea…I got plenty. Also, the batteries for my phone died. I forgot to charge it.” I say rolling my eyes, disgusted by my negligence.
“Are we done then?” Lover inquires, folding his arms.
“Almost. I just have one more request. I want to sketch you.” I beg. “You want to sketch me..? Aren't photo's enough?” Lover says with fatigued looking expression.
“No. They don't capture the raw physical energy you have…along with the sweet tender spirit that you possess. For it to be TRULY captured …well..I just gotta sketch you. Sorry dude.” I say, shrugging.
“Aright fine. Can I at least choose the pose?”
“It's your body. Choose whichever pose you think speaks to who YOU are.” I say, laying the sketching pad across my lap.
“Hmm…alright. I think this one does it.” Lover says, showing me a stance. I shutter..as I fully absorb the masculinity that was Lover. “God…yes. That pose says to me “I'm dangerous and ferocious…yet also agile and swift like a gazelle. Sig magnifique! Hold it!”Hours pass before I finally finish my master work. “Mwuuuah! Bella!” I scream, kissing my fingers with delight. Lover looks over at the finished product and gives an approving head nod. “Hey not bad. Though…I think you went a little over the top with the the rays of light shining down on my crotch.” He comments. “I figured it was fitting. In any case, I enjoyed this experience. I hope it was good for you as it was for me.” I conclude.
“This was the most bizarre experience of my life. ” he says with a stoic, serious face.“So…does this mean, we can do this again?” I ask, hesitantly. “Hell no. But you can sketch me again.” he replies.
“Awesome.” I yell, pumping my fist.
We later share a toast to friendship and go our separate ways.
[img]http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTii2W_1p7OYZHkgnsP1A3EOFTfNMcz9pQZ9F7ddExDovd4Y7fz9w[/img]I think what I find most amusing is the five likes that first pic got. :
lol…Martin. I say rule 34, because I have yet to find something that hasn't been twisted and warped to be pornographic. Nothing is immune to Rule 34.
Dinosaurs or Aliens?
Master thespian actor.
@ Terric ~
I'll be using that chocolate routine myself next time on someone.
Oh, and Tango. You sly dog you.
@ HB, Nat & Lover
I concur. TBH, it can be 8-bit dicey trying to decipher an entire sentence made entirely of abbreviations. Ofc, it's nb idea to learn them, imo. If anything tyt to understand something that seems to throw u off. LUL.
(__/)
(='.'
(“)_(“)Jonah Hill.
*looks around awkwardly*
Ehhh if by Zoerink you meant me, then I you're correct? Close enough, right?
Next to post is terric.
Stomach balloons up.
*head explodes*
Never have I seen so many inked up girls. Awesome stuff Marty, Mari', and J.
Seeing the pin up girls however got me hankering for some more.
@ Andrea
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